In Charge

Paintball is great fun! I have wanted to play for years but I had no one to play with.  I couldn't get the husband to play.  I couldn't get the boyfriend to play.  Now that I am single, I can actually do things that I couldn't do in a relationship.  I love, love, love dancing! Now that I am single, I can go dancing any time I want.  Not only can I go dancing any time I want, but I am told I am good at it.  I can dance to 80's music or I can ballroom dance.  My husband didn't dance.  He promised me he would take lessons. He didn't keep that promise.  In my 20's, I would dance 2 or 3 times a week.  When I got married, how I missed dancing. I don't have to miss it anymore.

When I have been in relationships, I would always submit what I desired and wished to the will of the person I was in the relationship with.  If they wanted to watch Family Guy on TV, we would watch only Family Guy.  If they wanted to spend the night in because they were too tired to go out, we would spend the night in.  Too bad if I wanted to go out with friends.  My wishes and desires were always left on the back burner.

For the first time in my life, I get to do what I want to do.  I don't need to let someone else dictate to me what they want or need or desire.  It is a great feeling.  If I want to go out to a bar and drink tequila, I can.  If I want to dance till 2 am, I can.  If I want to go play paintball for the first time in my life, I get to.

It's a great thing to be in charge of my life and not have to submit to a man.